WASHINGTON, DC - A curious, well-meaning developer went off the standard human diet of food yesterday and began consuming a forced intake of concentrated information marking the first step of his shocking and controversial effort to become one with the Internet. Although still technically closer to cyborg than he would care to admit, his confidence remains unshaken despite weeks of skepticism by online friends and household pets leading up to his decision. Minutes before the appointed moment that was to signal his departure from ordinary existence, exasperated co-workers were seen waving fiber optic cables and copies of Gray's Anatomy. When asked to comment, he threw a parsing error and offered no assistance.